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Tuesday, January 14, 2014

writer's block: freak

A couple of nights ago, I got together with a bunch of friends for dinner and we started talking about weird manias and phobias. Most of the people in the world have fears of one kind or another; fear of being alone, afraid of the dark, fear of spiders and tigers and bears! oh my!

And then the conversation grew into talking not only about weird fears but also weird obsessions. Has anyone seen that show on Health Channel about that? ..the one that features people with extremely bizarre disorders such as being addicted to eat soap; collecting hair from other people; falling in love with rats instead of people (yes! there's one about that!), among others.

Of course by then, I went for the tequila bottle and started to force everyone to confess their deepest manias, fears and obsessions...muahahahaha! (evil laugh).

Do you guys have any?

I have a ton:

1. "Ablutomania" : mania for washing oneself too often. I tend to wash my hands ALL THE TIME, I'm obsessed with germs and getting dirty so most of the time I touch something, I have the urge of washing my hands right's quite an obsessive compulsive disorder, but I've been able to keep it under the radar and in control...I think. Although...sometimes I've thrown away soaps after using them only once...I felt they were dirty after a wash or that bad?

2. OCD: Obsessive Compulsive Disorder about having everything, and I mean, EVERYTHING neat, clean and organized. I can't stand being in a messy room or dirty place. That's why I can't have roommates, I'm the lysol nazi...always, always cleaning after everyone.

3. Fear of having some sort of insect, particularly spiders; crawling inside my nose, mouth or ears while I'm asleep. I was 7 years old when I saw on the news a lady that had died because a cockroach got inside her ear and somehow reproduced and there were baby cockroaches living inside her brain...iuk!...Since then, I can't go to bed without checking and double checking the entire bed for bugs; and, I HAVE to sleep with the sheets covering my face, even if it is hot, I have to cover-up my ears, nose and mouth with the bed sheets; half of my face is covered, you can just gaze at my rolling eyes. True story, ask my sisters!

4. "Hypochondriasis" : mental disorder that mimics the appearance of a medical illness. I'm extremely aware of every minor bodily symptom, such as headaches, stomachaches, joint pain, random soreness.... and I start getting anxious about it, and then nervous, and as it keeps getting worse I start to panic until I finally go to the doctor...that's when I can calm down. I go to the doctor all the time, seriously... I spend a ridiculous amount of money in doctors and hospitals because I always have the need to go and check if this spot or this pain is normal or not.... most of the times, it is nothing; just stress and my mind playing tricks on me.
And also...If someone says to me, "my head hurts"...I immediately start getting a headache too for no reason; and I'm one of those people that googles all the symptoms and freaks out even more with the possibility of having sclerosis or cancer or a deadly thing of those. 

5. I can't eat in restaurants. I have food allergies, and because of this and several trips to the hospital due to swelling of the throat, vocal chords and skin rashes; I've developed a certain fear of food. Actually, not food itself but more of not knowing how it was cooked, where it was cooked, who cooked it and stuff like that. 
I became a vegan because I started researching about processed foods and meats and well, I found nothing but ugly things there so it was obvious for me to turn vegan and I have been one for over 7 years and I'm happy about that. But still, I can't eat in restaurants. I can't eat something if I didn't see how it was cooked; of course I can easily take granola bars, skittles, lollipops or peanuts into my mouth BUT, there's something about eating in restaurants I cannot tolerate, not unless I see how it is being cooked and by whom. That's why I love subway restaurants...I can see all that goes on in my food plate.

By now, you must probably think I'm some sort of a freak, and you're right! I'm gonna stop here and skip the other manias and phobias I have...'cause yes, there are more!

Anyway..I hope I don't turn into Howard Hughes in the Aviator with all those weird disorders; I don't think I'm at his level yet...but on Jack Nicholson's in As Good as it Gets; I think I am.

If you have a mania or phobia, there is still hope for you; it can be cured. I remember as a child I suffered from "achluophobia", fear of the darkness; and I went to sleep at night with the lights on, and I'm not talking about a tiny night light, I mean the real thing; lights on, TV or radio on; I left the door open so I could see the outside of my room with lights on of course. I spent more than 10 years of my life sleeping like that, it wasn't until college when this thing miraculously ended and I now sleep in complete darkness and total silence.
Oh and I was also afraid that the "buggy man" would come out of my closet, "bogyphobia", but that's over too. 

You can find a list of manias and obsessions HERE and HERE!

Now it is your turn!...what are your secret manias, phobias and disorders??


  1. I have a terrible fear for spiders. I cannot ever screma. I stop, cannot move and do nothing! Just wait that someone comes to help me!
    Facebook Page Bonjourchiara
    Bloglovin Bonjourchiara

  2. Great photos <3
    Check out my latest outfit post?

    Your Princess is in Another Castle

    xx Sofie

  3. I'm horribly afraid of deep, dark water. I just know something will reach in and drag me down. I have an irrational fear of Sharks being inside of swimming pools. Don't have any idea why because I know i isn't possible but I've freaked myself out to the point that I almost drowned in pool once because I convinced myself in my mind that a shark was gonna pop out of the grate against the wall.

    The weirdest phobia I have is really hard to explain. Sometimes if I look at something that has a texture I don't like, I feel like I'm going to vomit and I cannot look at ti at all. Pinatas do it. Like, when a lot of concentric circles are lined up next to each other like fish scales or stuff... I feel sick thinking about it.

    Your phobias sound exactly like my sister. Don't worry, girl. You aren't alone.

    Tightrope to the Sun

    1. Hahaha my best friend has exactly the same phobia about textures, she can't even see spores or jelly stuff like that from the sea.., you're not alone either :)

  4. In my case it is quite the opposite. I USED to have way too many obsessions and mental disorders (you know me, i don't need to tell you this haha). But it has been like a year since I've been the most regular, ordinary, non-obsessive person in the world. My mind is focused now and it wasn't before. The funny thing is though that i miss it...and i am not entirely sure if i like being "normal". I guess we all change with time, i just hope i am changing in the right direction. :)


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